Waddle That Runway


i waddle,

but it is not an unsightly limp,

it is an iconic strut. 

my father was a king known to be unsteady

his steps, were no missteps, instead he 

saw what others saw as clumsy

to be a sign that he was ready

because unlike the other species, no one held that

rhythmic sashay from side to side

that my mother, a queen, held with all her pride

we are the fluffy future this world awaits

an original artwork from mother nature’s gallery

no other species holds our traits

unless you count those 

budget duck, four-legged webbed feet

really suck, frankenstein deadbeat

basically traced, copy and paste 

mammals that for some reason lay eggs

discount walmart, rip-off tryhard

no-wings, platypus-things. 

this whole species is full of kings, queens, and non-binary beans

this superiority you see? it runs in the genes. 

waterproof feathers, multi-coloured heathers, 

and we’re omnivorous, cause’ we’re not picky eaters – 

i don’t know why y’all think we care about the haters

because that’s just another name

for no-fame over-committed alligators

and they totally copied the crocodiles too.

i think. 

i am unlike any other winged being, 

and it’s about time y’all started seeing

just how happy we are with our beautiful bodies

and the sheer glamour this little waddle embodies

and that

is how you waddle

that runway

Shanice Peh (Class of 2026) is a passionate writer who continuously ducks out while reading her old poultry, which many writers would understand is often arduous and dreadful. She hopes her puns quack people up and always seeks to improve.